December 2003
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Best wishes for the festive season
Quebec school 'report card' tells it like it is
Export education levy decision defies logic
House prices rise in school zoning areas, Christchurch study finds
A rich history of private tertiary education in New Zealand
New Zealand's oldest English language school celebrates 25 years
Charter school movement growing and results improving, study shows
2003 education policy highlights
Quote of the month
New funding aims to encourage entrepreneurial spirit in tertiary education
Another step toward Yesterday's Schools
Principal's stand against zoning supported by MP
For-profit early childhood centres applauded
Good principals essential, says Canadian report
Private schools booming for poor in India
Big hike in US tertiary education fees
Teachers union to run private school in New York
Report shows how to implement school choice successfully
Private schooling to be encouraged by China's Sichuan province
workINSIGHT issue 3 available now

If you would like a paper copy of Subtext, you can print this page or click on the image above to download a pdf version of the complete newsletter.

Ten signs you're enrolled in a dodgy computer course

1. Your tutor has worked more on ‘PD’ than ‘PDF’.

2. Course advertisements are stamped ‘Approved by NZQA’.

3. As an inducement to enrol, it offers a six-pack of beer and a carton of smokes.

4. You ask the tutor where you can get some Coke and he replies, "I don't know, but there's a P Lab in Room 10".

5. The computers are not only wireless, but also cordless.

6. You notice all the software is branded 'Mikerosoft'.

7. Ctrl Alt Delete takes you to a page asking you for your Westpac account details.

8. When she can't answer a question the tutor refers you to one of the receivers.

9. The lesson takes twice as long as planned because the tutor is simultaneously working as a telemarketer using a phone in the lab.

10. Your diploma is signed by the Minister of Education, Dr Bernie Ogilvy.

Source: St Molesworth - an (almost) weekly, satirical, electronic newsletter that says of itself that it "may cause offence to apologists for the current government. So it isn't for those who suffer from congenital humourlessness, or those who have had their sense of humour surgically removed by the government".

For the St Molesworth webpage, click here.